The Arctic Race
by Selath
Summary: Canada is tired of being bullied over his weak Northern Borders and his boss said it was time to do something about it! Recent events included...
1. Chapter 1

The Arctic Race

"Yes... Yes!" Canada 'shouted' as loud as he dared his boss had decided to put up the funds for a great leap in the development of Canadian Nationhood. He felt a warm blush slide over him, nothing official yet but...

Canada twirled on a nearby Ottawa lamp post as a couple walked by commenting on how nice it is to see Matthew so happy during these economic bad times. Matthew noticed them and stepped down laughing nervously his excitement still mounting keeping him positively glowing with heat in the cold Canadian winter. To think he would finally after all of Alfred and Ivan's laughter at his Arctic sovereignty and internal waters, he would get a...

Dare he say it...? He did "Battleship." A fresh spout of giddy laughter flowed out from him.

Sure Britain had always been nice and named a few of his ships after the country but... He never let Canada man the darn things, and now that he was all grown up it was about time he had one... or maybe two his smile widened... No no that would be greedy Matthew shook his head frowning and they must remember to save money... But a Battleship! Canada sighed lovingly as he walked past a dark alley. Suddenly a cold hand snatched him into the alley scooping him up. A cold dry kiss was planted squarely on his forehead as he squirmed.

"You vere thinking of me, Da?" Ivan circled the second largest nation with his first largest arms.

"Ah! Russia!" Canada blushed as Russia planted another cold kiss on Matthew's neck.

"You are villing to concede North Pole to mother Russia?" Russia added kiss after kiss on Canada's forehead and lips.

"N-no! You better not mess with m-me Russia!" Canada mumbled as Russia stroked his long curly hair "I-I'll defend myself!"

Russia pulled away for a second looking at the bunched up and blushing Matthew very seriously. The great big Russian smiled pulling the nation in for a sweet embrace. Canada wiggled free ducking Russia's passionate phrasing of 'Become one with mother Russia!'.

"You are joking, Da?" Ivan laughed but then turned serious "Your joke is not funny, now be one with Russia!"

"No! No Joke Ivan I'm very serious I'm getting a battleship and everything to protect my Arctic sovereignty..." Canada nodded then noticed the look in Russia's eyes.

"I see..." The winter had gotten much colder around the great big nation "Your boss has said this has he..."

"W-well..." Canada stammered "He's been promising a build up of ships and naval ports with billions of dollars..."

"This means Battleship, da?" Russia seemed less threatening

"Well I'll call him right now!" Matthew pulled out his Cell phone "He'll tell you himself! Hi Mr. Boss I need you to tell Ivan something about the ships you're building..." with a smug smile Canada handed Ivan the phone.

Ivan took the phone smiling pleasantly.

"Da?"

"Is that so, gosh..."

"Very impressive comrade..."

"I knew you vere very serious..."

"Da?"

"Da 6 to 8, most very mighty of a fleet..." Canada took a few steps closer to Russia at this letting the larger nation put an arm around him

"I find it is most definitely a fearsome deterrent..." Canada wrapped his arms around the Russians waist.

"I am impressed... No sir I have no intention of any hostile acts on Canadian territory and no prior knowledge of the possibility..." Canada lightly kissed Russia's cheek now that he felt secure Russia gave a wicked smile glancing at Canada and tightening his grip making the nation squeak nervously "Da, 6-8 Patrol Vessels will definitely hold the North West passage to the whim of the Canadian Nation."

Canada's jaw dropped into an 'O' as Russia closed the cell phone hanging up.

"You're going to raep me now aren't you?" Matthew whimpered.

"Right through the pants..." Russia pushed his cool mouth almost violently against the Canadians...

The End? (For now)


	2. Chapter 2

Negotiate Me!

`` Okay now Matthew I need you to understand something...``Alfred pointed a finger at his little brother "I OWN THE NORTH POLE! You see due to recent and upcoming discoveries of the Alaska ocean floor the north pole is in our internal waters..."

"Eh, I-I don't understand..." Matthew confessed to his big brother who'd been explaining the concept to Canada for several minutes now.

"I don't even understand why your here at all!" Norway stepped in-between the two brother nations eyeing America suspiciously " Alaska isn't even close to the north pole!"

"It is time to reveal my secret weapon!" America unrolled a map in front of Norway "The hero will prevail!"

Norway took the hand drawn map America had upside down eyeing the rough sketch of Alfred standing on Alaska and a helpfully labelled 'North Pole' beside him. The border had Russia to the right and Canada to the left across the ocean, after a taking a deep breath of impatience Norway spoke "This is so fake!"

Canada cuddled his polar bear trying to stop the shouting words from America and Norway.

'What do you mean its fake! I drew that myself!'

A dark presence loomed over Canada sending out waves of cold, and as there was only one country larger than Canada, Matthew froze in fear. Ivan dragged Canada back from the argument.

'Exactly!'

Canada turned around to stare a softly laughing Russia in the face "H-hi Ivan..." Canada meaped as the scary country gied.

'Yeah I own the north pole!'

Russia placed a hand against Matthew's cheek " Happy to see me, da?"

'The geography isn't even right, Canada is on the right of Alaska!'

"D-da!" Canada squeaked as he felt Ivan pull him close breathing coldly down his neck...

'Really? Let me see that map!'

"Do we really need these to nobodies to debate our own claims to the artic?"

'Fine'

"I-I think its f-for the..." Canada blushed profusely biting his lip as Russia stoked one of his hairs.

'There is that better?'

"We do not need their help to settle our disputes reasonably correct?" Ivan spun Canada around and lifting the back of his Roots hoodie placing his cold fingers against Canada's gently warm back.

'You just crossed out the countries names and switched them!'

Matthew felt himself being seduced by the more violent nation but he couldn't help the fact his heart was racing.

"Tell them to leave and we can... disgust things more privately, Da?"

America and Norway approached the embracing nations and said together "What are you doing?!?"

"Tell them what we've decided Matthew..." Ivan kissed Canada's neck and held his waist.

"We, we, we... Think it would be best if just I and Russia talked it out, for now, eh?" Matthew looked up into Russia`s being gentle face.

"What?" America held his hand drawn map upside-down.

"But we have a stake in this too!" Norway shook his fist

"Leave..." Russia glared waves of evil at them laughing "Kolkolkolkol..."

America and Norway both walked quickly backwards out of the room. Matthew looked up at Ivan. Mother Russia looked down at Canada waves of evil radiating off of him still. Canada suddenly realised what he did.

"You're going to raep me aren't you?" Matthew whimpered...

"Well if you insist!" Russia ripped off Canada's hoodie his eyes gleaming in a not so gentle way.


End file.
